Quinn has arrived!!

He's here!!! He was born yesterday at 2:57pm. :o) We're both doing great!!

He was delivered in route to the birth center! In the front passenger seat of our minivan!!! We were on our way to to our midwife to continue laboring until I was ready to head to the hospital, where I had to be in order to be allowed to attempt a VBAC. Less than 3 hours earlier I was only 1-2 cm dilated! But he had other plans. Lol! It was an incredibly peaceful entrance, no one panicked, and he was so perfect! Greg couldn't even pull over, or stop!

I'm thrilled that I never had to go to the hospital at all! Any "risk" from vbac'ing was gone already and we got to stay at the birth center!

We were home 3 hours later & we're doing so well. I can't believe how perfectly it turned out after all. :o) He was 9 lbs 3 ounces. And I never pushed at all, my body took over and I was just along for the ride! What an experience!

So, I had a successful VBAC, my first unmedicated birth, delivered him myself, and got to be at the birth center!!!!! Words cannot describe our joy & gratitude about it all. God's plans are amazing. I am in awe of how He worked it all out! He granted me the desires of my heart in every single way. :o)

Counting down to meeting our newest addition!

So, 2 weeks or less!! The due date is Nov 7, but my youngest daughter came 2 weeks early out of the blue, so it could be any time really!! I sure would love to have prayers, we're going for a vaginal birth after cesarean this time, and we believe it will go perfectly!!!

It's a busy time of year for us! I see the chiropractor (finally) on Wednesday, Halloween is Friday, and my youngest daughter turns 4 on Saturday! I'll be thrilled if Quinn waits until after Saturday to make his appearance! ;o) But, we all are so excited to meet him & it'll be exciting to see how it all goes!!!

A peek at me!

Thank you everyone for the well wishes!!! :o)

Here I am today at 22 weeks along, over half way there!!

Take an early look at the little one!

I thought I would share an ultrasound photo! I'm over half way through the pregnancy & finally feeling good most of the time!! It was a sick few months, but I'll take the good & the bad though. I truly love being a part of the miracle of life! It's such an amazing blessing!! So, if anyone still checks in here, thank you for your thoughts, prayers & support. Please take a look at our third child & our first son- Quinn Matthew. :o) We're already in love with the little guy!!!!

Sorry I went missing!!

I didn't mean to leave ya'll hanging! I'm so sorry, I just haven't checked in lately. I've still been pretty ill. The morning noon & night sickness didn't go away at 13 weeks like it did with my girls. Go figure!! I'm still throwing up even. That's alright, it could be a lot worse. Anyway, being online seems to make me even sicker, plus it gives me a headache. Sort of like being sea sick. Thanks so much to those checking in on me, I really apologize for being MIA and causing worry!!

How are things going?

Things are going well. :o) The thought of certain raw fruits are not as repulsive as they were. Like grapes, strawberries, and cantaloupe. I knew my body would come back around! I feel like I could be ready to try a green smoothie sometime soon as well, just not yet.

I began taking FloraVital iron supplement (the yeast free version of Floradix) last Saturday. After one week & 2 days I'm surprised at how much the dizziness and weakness has subsided! That didn't go away when I started eating cooked foods. I did not have any blood tests, so I don't know for certain that I was anemic, but several rawbies that I trust mentioned a strong correlation between morning sickness and anemia. I have a history of being anemic, so I felt prompted to get that supplement.

I also realized just 3 days ago that if I eat something with protein every three hours I can really cut down on the severe nausea. I still feel generally nauseas most of the time, but if I let myself get hungry, I have to go lay down, or sit down & I'm just done. I get very weak & feel like I can't stand. At that point, I pretty much have to wait for food to be brought to me! How ridiculous! But really, I feel like I just can't do anything at that point. It would almost be better if I actually threw up at these times, if that would help me feel better long enough to make some food! I'm glad I figured out the three hour thing, now I can stay on top of it. The past couple of weeks if we're all out at church functions, or shopping, etc I'll look at Greg and say "I'm getting hungry" and he immediately goes into food find mode! He knows what's coming! Lol. Now, finding snacks & meals with that much protein (that sounds appetizing) is a challenge. Especially on our budget!!

I have had an unbelievable appetite as well. I'm not sure if I mentioned that in my last post. But for my 7 months raw I had a very small appetite. My very first cooked meal, that baked potato that I had- I ate the entire thing (it was huge) and could have eaten more. After 4 days of not being able to keep anything but apple & watermelon down that really surprised me. I would have thought my stomach had shrunk a bit while eating raw. But since that very first cooked meal, I've been eating normal portions in one sitting & sometimes getting more. It's shocking to me. Really. I haven't "overdone" it, but it just surprises me after going so long on such light food.

I know I've gained weight these last couple weeks. I'm trying hard not to let that bother me. When I was pregnant with my girls I didn't let weight gain or loss get to me. But I was very overweight through both of those pregnancies. At least 250 pounds. What I felt back then was that my body was finally doing something right, something amazing! And there weren't many size or shape changes early on because of all the extra weight I was carrying. This time, I find myself very preoccupied with my shape and size. I've gotten very bloated I've gained 10 pounds! It's also my third baby, so I know I've started showing already, but it's mostly bloat. And maybe some of that 10 pounds is water weight. I need to not dwell on it. It's truly is a new experience for me though, actually finding myself concerned about this during pregnancy, and seeing changes so early on!

It seems to be part of an identity crisis I'm experiencing. It's not a true "crisis", just an odd thing to be going through. I'll just spill this out real quick- In the past three months or so my hair has really changed. I've lost about half of it. I always had super thick hair. It sounds silly, but I don't really feel like me without my hair! It seemed to happen when I died it darker. I had been getting highlights to hide my gray hairs and I couldn't afford that anymore. Since using the die from the box, my hair has gradually gotten very thin & the ends are frizzy & curly. So odd. I don't know if the die did it, the rapid weight loss (which seemed steady and safe honestly), or if it could be a deficiency. It's not the pregnancy, since it started before that, but it might make it worse.

Also, the weight loss itself seemed so out of my control. I never exercised, so I didn't make an effort to work on a certain area. Where the weight came off and when was anyone's guess. The last 11 pounds that I lost, when I had the flu, made a bigger difference than you would think. All of the sudden, several places were really saggy. And my knees were bony enough that I had to sleep with a pillow between them. I was waking myself up all night when them knocking each other, it hurt! My dad said he no longer recognized me, even though he sees me weekly and saw the weigh come off gradually. My face looked, and still looks different than it ever has. I'm sure this happens to women who've been overweight for a decade or more. Especially since my early adulthood was spent obese. Everyone looks different in their 30's than form when they were in high school. The last time I was a normal weight was high school.

But anyway- I had been obese & morbidly obese for years. I'm 32 and I was larger than I am now on my wedding day 12 years ago. So that was pretty much my mental size & shape. You know, how you can be very large but when you imagine yourself, or even dream sometimes, you're still small? I had kind of moved past that. Which means my current, still overweight, but no longer morbidly obese body is the new image to get used to. I started eating cooked foods on a Friday. The next day we went to a restaurant for vegetarian burritos. When we got home I literally just sat and stared at myself in the mirror for several minutes. Greg asked what was going on. And it was like, I am this new person- a raw vegan. So different than I was. And I had just taken this new person to a place the old person would have gone to. The new person didn't drink soda, or the huge meaty burrito, but it still created this weird identity issue. I'm still dealing with it obviously, with the hair, the face, the saggy skin, and now the shape changes. I just don't feel like me. I think prayer is the best way to resolve it. I just need to find some quiet time to get still and talk this over with God, you know?!

Well, I really rambled on there!! I hope I made sense, this is new to me & a little hard to explain! Time to go eat... again!

Not so raw for now...

Thank you for your comments of support, encouragement & suggestions last week everyone. After much prayer & way too much thought, I started eating cooked foods last Friday afternoon. And I've been feeling much better. Not 100% better, of course, but I've been keeping food down since I started eating the cooked foods. I've had mostly vegetarian bean burritos & the baked potatoes I was craving. There hasn't been one thing that I've eaten that hasn't agreed with me, or has made me sicker. I was so worried about that! I still get nauseas, but there's something that sounds good, I can eat, and it stays down. I still can't even think about raw foods or green smoothies yet. I know it will come though, I just can't push it or it will take longer to get back to the raw foods.

I asked Greg to pray, and to ask to be released from the raw food conviction as well. At first, I thought that it was wonderful that he was willing to stay raw. But then it felt like a division, a lack of unity in the family. My kids would have been even more confused. He prayed about it for a bit, because like me, he doesn't want to be disobedient to God. Eventually he felt a peace about it & joined me in a bean & rice burrito. He hasn't gotten sick either. He's still eating raw most of the day while at work.

There are lines we will not cross, like overly processed foods, junk foods, or fast foods. We have no desire at all to eat those things. If we did, we still wouldn't eat them, it would be a terrible example to our girls. No ketchup on anything, no soda, no sugar, fried foods, no desserts, I'm sure there are more. I've done my best to explain to our girls why there have been changes recently. And we take opportunities when ordering at restaurants to talk about why we chose a sweet potato instead of fries as a side, or why we drink water as opposed to soda. I think that helps them 'get it'. I don't want them to think that just because we've introduced some cooked foods into our daily routines that all the healthy stuff flies out the window. Because when we used to eat cooked foods, that meant major junk foods. This is new territory!! They love the new variety of foods. I've never seen a 6 & 3 year old so excited to have a baked potato! My goodness.

I'm one of those women that absolutely love being pregnant, even through the morning sickness. The worry & extreme emotional distress of last week was robbing me of my joy! I wanted so badly to do the right thing. And I believe I did. I also believe that I'll be raw again soon, I am not who I used to be. Cooked food doesn't control me anymore & I needed to trust myself & God enough to see that. Thank you to those that pointed that out to me. Yall's support means more than I can say! I love you all, thank you so much!

Raw food crisis

Not to be too dramatic, but this has been the worst week of my raw food life!

The morning, noon, & night sickness has kicked in & every raw food that I've consumed in the last 7 months now disgusts me. :o( I've thrown up only twice, but I can't eat much at all regardless. Tuesday I couldn't keep anything down at all. And all I ate was a young coconut & an orange!! Yesterday I was able to keep down 1 apple and some watermelon. Today I've had an apple.

I had morning sickness this bad with my first pregnancy (except I could keep more food down & had more options that sounded appealing), but not as bad with my second. I'm spending most of the day in bed, too weak to do anything. It's lasting all day & all night & it's complete with dizziness, headaches, and nausea. My poor kids! It's very difficult to even type this up. I had truly convinced myself that I wouldn't have it this time! I had psyched myself out, really! I was so arrogant and thought that 7 months raw would mean I wouldn't have any morning sickness!! That's ok though, positive thinking can't hurt, and hey- no one can tell me it's a mental thing! I also convinced myself that there's no way I'd not be 100% raw throughout this pregnancy!

So, most of you know that I'm raw because of a spiritual conviction, and I'm really conflicted about what to do now. It's tearing me up guys & I don't think I can even explain in writing how distraught I am. I'm promise I'm not being a drama queen, although I'm sure I am very hormonal. I've spent a lot of today in tears over food. Ridiculous! I've cried because I want the foods that sustained me though my other 2 successful pregnancies, like cheese pizza from my fave restaurant, my all time favorite pregnancy meal- a huge baked potato with butter, sour cream, cheddar, and salsa. I also want nachos & burritos and sushi (not the raw kind). :o(

This is what's going through my head while lying in bed and being overwhelmed with waves of nausea morning to night! And I keep praying, thanking God for this little miracle, such a blessing! I also pray for guidance though. This is way more than cravings, I've had intense cravings while pregnant, and this is way more than that! I'm not sure whether these are cravings on steroids, spiritual attack, or time to take a different approach. ????? No answer yet. I'm trying to be still and be patient.

I'm an extremist. It's all or nothing. Several times I've admired and praised other raw foodists for the way they have such a healthy balanced approach to this lifestyle. Like, staying raw 90% of the time, but eating with family with no bad feelings about it. They're able to just go with the flow, and it doesn't send them into a tailspin. But for me, eating any cooked wouldn't just be a very slippery slope, it would be a landslide! I don't see how pregnancy changes that?! I aspire to get to a healthy place where food no longer holds that addictive quality for me & I could easily and effortlessly just eat a bit of cooked and stay high raw. I'm just not sure I'm there. I doubt that I'm there.

On the other hand, I do not want to be so dogmatic about this lifestyle that I end up being prideful or stubborn about it. At the expense of my health & the baby's. I'm not able to eat the raw foods right now, and for some reason eating cooked sounds like it will settle my stomach. So, even though the food would be cooked, it would be nourishment! It might just be in my head though. No guarantee that a vegan burrito, or potato with salsa wouldn't make me even sicker.

I've seen several raw foodists open that door though & regret it tremendously. It seems once you walk away from raw, it's incredibly difficult to go back for a lot of people. Greg said he would stay 100% raw even if I don't, so that we wouldn't go downhill from here. I think it's amazing that he's willing to do that. But it feels very unfair since this journey has been much harder for him than it has been for me.

Also, there's the miscarriage fear. I never had any morning sickness last year when I experienced the miscarriages, so this is actually a great sign, being so sick. But if I were to not be 100% raw anymore and, God forbid, something bad happened- I would blame myself, lets be honest.

Yes, I'm praying, but I just don't have a peace either way about this. I really feel a bit lost, and desperate. Not a good place to be when making a big decision.

7 months raw!

Wow, 7 months already?! I'm actually posting this the night before 7 months raw, because I may be without internet the 13th through the 17th. I didn't want to not have the blog updated though!!

So, things have been kind of tough around here. Since we had the flu, most foods don't really sound good to Greg. It's been hard to go through. It brings up all of those feelings of just wanting to be normal & eat with everyone else. We would be watching TV and I could just see the pain on his face at the sight of Outback commercials and Hardee's burgers. It's not always easy, that's for sure. Two Saturday's ago I was running errands all around town with my girls. I just kept wishing, with an unexpected sadness, that I could stop somewhere and have a normal lunch with them at a restaurant. It would be special, and so typical. That feeling lasted a few days actually, like I was mourning it all over again. I almost cried at an Arby's reuben commercial. :o(

We've stuck through it though. And found out that we love the kale salad in Alissa's recipe book. I've fixed that salad about 10 times in 7 days!! When the salad doesn't appeal to us as much anymore, who knows what we'll go to next. Maybe good ole fresh fruits will sound good again? Being tired of the foods or finding them unappetizing can't last forever right?

I'm still having a green smoothie each day, I know they're so good for us. The kids have a decent glass of it as well. Greg got burnt out on them though, for now. It's really tough to keep him happy. He didn't enjoy the dinner I made last night. It's disappointing, when that happens since of course I want him to enjoy the meals that I prepare. I guess I was lucky when we ate cooked foods, he liked almost everything I cooked. Wish I had the same streak of success with raw! Lol. I know it's frustrating for him as well, he's tired of not enjoying meals & wonders what he should eat. I think he would be happier with more variety. Trying out a lot of recipes isn't really in our budget unfortunately.

So Greg is still at 157. He got down to 155 during the past month, but with all the kale salads (there's avocado in it) he put 3 pounds back on & is very happy with that. I'm happy I finally found a way to get avocados into him!! He told me last night that he's finally ready to exercise!! Yay! So he opted not to take a photo this month since he's reached the finish line. :o) I've posted a photo of his start & finish though!!! Take a look at the before, 8/12/07 and his after 2/12/08 with 83 pounds released total! Isn't he amazing!?! I'm SO incredibly proud of him!! He's still 100% raw, he seems really happy with his weight & now he wants to exercise and bulk up a bit (oh, and find some foods he just loves).

I now weigh 185 pounds, that's 84 pounds released in 7 months!! I released 10 pounds in the past month! Actually, while I had the flu I released 11 pounds in only 6 days. Yikes. So I just gained a pound back & have stayed there. And it feels great!!! That's 111 pounds lost since my highest weight in Jan 2006!

I went ahead and measured, I'm sorry I forgot to do it last month. So the inches lost over the past 2 months are: 7.5! Now that doesn't seem all that impressive. But, amazingly, that means that in 7 months I have lost an even 60 inches!!! Let me elaborate a bit. :o) I've lost 2 inches in my neck since I started raw, 8 inches in my bust, 1.5 inches in each of my upper arms (yay!), 9.5 inches in my waist, and 10 inches in my hips!!! Wow!

I finally got a pair of size 14 jeans!! Yippee! A milestone! So you'll see in the newest photo that they fit much better than the size 20's I was still wearing! Lol! I still can't seem to lose this belly, upper or lower. It's smaller, but still out of proportion. And now I'll be growing a belly in a whole new way. ;o) Who knows if it will ever be trim and fit?! I keep having to buy XL shirts because of my upper arms and upper belly, but the shirts are too lose in the shoulders. I'm not complaining though, I'll take whatever I can get. I abused my body for a very long time & it's going to take a while to get it where it should be. Some things will take longer than others, and I am so thrilled with the great results I've had in the last 7 months. Now, what in the world will my shape & size do during the next 9 months? I can't wait to find out!! I've never gone through a pregnancy below 250 pounds before!

This is such an interesting time! Greg's done with his weight loss & I might be as well for the next 8 months! I say 'might' because I lost weight during my first pregnancy, so I might not gain a bunch with this one since I'm still overweight, and I'm 100% raw. Who knows?! You can be sure I will document it here though!! I've loved sharing all of this with you guys these past 7 months & I'm so excited to continue sharing this journey with you all!!! :o)

6 months RAW!!!!

I was finally able to sit down at the computer, figure out where the photos went, and get them all sorted out & ready! The way we save photos to our computer changed & I'm not as tech savvy as Greg, so it was a small challenge! LOL!

So, on 2/13/08 when these photos were taken, Greg weighed in at 157 pounds! That's 8 more pounds released in the past month!!! His size 34 pants are super baggy now, so we need to go shopping! He's already past his goal weight also.

I weighed in at 195 releasing a total of 6 pounds in one month. That's a 4 pound gain from my low of 191 at the end of the juice fast. Not too bad after a fast, but I thought I would release more during a month!! I completely forgot to take measurements. :o( Please forgive me!!!!! But honestly, there wasn't much of a change, as you can see in the pictures. The biggest change I see was darkening my hair back to my natural color! LOL!

Here are the photos!!

I just thought that was the most excellent news!!!!

We got a positive pregnancy test Sunday morning!!! Praise God!! We're so beyond thrilled!!! I don't even have the words to express our joy!! We're due Nov. 7th. :o)

Most excellent news!!

I know I still need to update with the 6 month photos, but I just had time to add this, so it'll have to do for now!

If you haven't been reading my blog for the past 6 months & don't know about my miscarriages last year, you might want to go read my very first entry. That way you'll know what I'm talking about!!

During my 22 day juice fast, my main prayer was about pregnancy. I prayed that God would show us when to start trying again. And of course I pray that He will bless us with a successful pregnancy & that I'll never have another miscarriage. After going through the second miscarriage last year, we had intentionally not been allowing pregnancy to be a possibility. Now, this goes against our personal spiritual beliefs. Both of my daughters were planned. My pregnancies last year were surprises. It was lovely to not plan it all out, but, we felt like until whatever was wrong with me was fixed, it would be reckless to get pregnant again. The doctors said I most likely had a polyp, and it would require a saline ultrasound to diagnose it, and then a procedure to remove it.

Back to my 22 day fast... So I prayed that God would guide us, since a decision would have to be made to start trying again, or at least stop preventing, at the very least. Also, at one of the prayer meetings at the church that did the 22 day fast they had prayers for healing. I stood up, and I believed that I was healed, once and for all. The next week, they asked again for anyone who needed healing to come forward. For a split second I considered going. And then I heard in my mind: You're already healed. And in that moment I was so confident of that!

As soon as my fast ended, the very next day, Jan 31st, I told Greg that I had an incredible peace about trying right away, the next cycle. Our new health insurance was about to kick in Feb 1st, and my cycle was just starting.

4 days later my sister found out she was unexpectedly pregnant! Of course I was happy for her, but I was also attacked with the strangest doubts suddenly. It seemed like the enemy was filling my head with thoughts such as "you'll never have another successful pregnancy" and "God isn't going to bless you like that." I really prayed about this and struggled with these feelings. It totally caught me off guard that a blessing for someone else would cause me to doubt something that I had just felt such a peace and confidence about!! Of course, the enemy never attacks us in the way we think he will. It's always the last thing we expect. I was so confused! So, I talked with my friends about it, and my sister. I prayed for days.

That was one emotionally draining week! So draining that I had mentioned to Greg and my sister that I just didn't think I could have all these feelings resolved in time to try this month. I wanted to be completely at peace, and I wanted to be checked out by an OB for confirmation! I wanted to make sure we were doing things in His perfect timing, by His guidance. I wanted it all to be peaceful & perfect. When things didn't seem to be going that way, I was ready to wait longer. There's no way I want to be out of God's timing if I can help it!

By one week later, I felt like I was getting a grip on it all. On Tues Feb 12th, I felt this overwhelming need to surrender. To accept the blessings I have as enough. I had to accept that what I have is just right, perfect even. Not to mention of course that I don't even deserve the blessings that I have! I just knew, in my heart, that I must say to God, "I surrender. If you don't want me to have any more children, I will praise you anyway, love you anyway, and thank you for what I do have." It sounds silly, but this was a hard thing for me to say & mean it. I never take my blessings for granted, really. But I want more babies, and that's a strong feeling for me. I was having a terrible time accepting the idea that I might be done with pregnancies. It's so odd to me how when something is not in our control anyway, we have such a hard time admitting that! It's not like I could ever have more babies without it being in His plan, yet, I didn't want to take no for an answer. So I took something He already controls, and 'let' Him have control over it again. So ridiculous, and yet so human and normal. But, He honors that, cause I've done in other areas of my life & seen amazing blessings after 'giving' it back to Him. Thank you God for your grace & mercy!!

Of course, as soon as as I said those words of surrender, I felt such a peace again about trying this month (and just in time).

I called my OB the next day (our 6 month raw anniversary day!) and asked to get a saline ultrasound. Unbelievably, they had an opening the very next day, Valentine's Day! I asked them if they had anything later in the month- because I had resolved that there was no way I was going to be able to try in Feb, and to hear I needed to come in the next day just sounded crazy to me! They didn't have any other openings for Feb. WOW!

On the way to the appointment the song Voice of Truth by Casting Crowns came on the radio. Maybe you you know it, but I've heard it a hundred times & it spoke to me much differently that morning. You know how the enemy had been telling me since my sister's good news that I wasn't going be pregnant ever again, etc. Here are a few lyrics of the song:
"But the giant's calling out
my name and he laughs at me
Reminding me of all the times
I've tried before and failed
The giant keeps on telling me
time and time again
"Boy you'll never win,
you'll never win."

But the voice of truth tells me a different story
the voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
and the voice of truth says "this is for my glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth"

The glory part - I had always said that, that whatever was wrong with me was being healed this past 6 months & it was going to be for His glory somehow. I felt very comforted by that song at that moment, and was in tears.

So, first the ultrasound tech did a normal internal ultrasound. And she said things still looked weird to her, and left to get the OB so we could move on to the saline part of the exam. I prayed and told God that I knew everything was alright. No matter what, I knew He was in control & everything was ok. That I believed I was healed. As I was saying this prayer, I had my hand lifted up slightly, because I truly could feel Jesus with me right then and there in that room, holding my hand. I was so calm & felt such peace!

So, the OB came in and did the saline part. They put the saline solution through a tiny catheter inside to open up the uterus. Then, they can see if a polyp is there because it it's more visible that way. It's not a super comfy procedure, but not super painful either.

Turns out they saw absolutely nothing unusual in the saline ultrasound! Whatever it was that caused my miscarriages last year, is gone! That's nothing short of miraculous folks!! Now, of course, I never had a true diagnosis of a polyp. It was their best guess last year and I didn't have health insurance to be able to get the saline ultrasound back then. We didn't want a true diagnosis anyway, or it would have been a pre-existing condition when I did get health insurance. So it's not a medically documented healing. But I know something was wrong & I know whatever it was, it's gone! I know it was healed over these past 6 months of 100% raw foods! When they left the room I literally jumped up and down praising God! And saying Happy 6 month Anniversary & Happy Valentine's Day!! :o)

Oh, and they could tell that the egg hadn't released yet & gave me an idea of when to try (which was the next 2 or 3 days, which is when I had originally planned to try anyhow back 2 weeks before)! I was so thrilled that it was all good news! And so very thankful.

Just a few days before the exam, I was saying how there was no way God could resolve all these issues in one short week, because I had already estimated that we needed to be trying for baby from the 15th to the 17th. And each day of the week He worked something else out for me. Even the ultrasound appointment! Amazing!!

I'm in awe, once again. It all happened in precise timing! Then, Sunday I was sick as a dog, no more trying for baby! There was a window, and that's all we had. It was perfect! And if I don't get pregnant yet (should know in a few days), I'm going to be ok with that. I've made my mind up. ;o)

God gave me a peace about when to start trying. The enemy tried to get me out of God's timing, and while I was ready to wait if God said so, I just prayed even more fervently about it all! And the Lord worked it all out. We ended up going forward in His timing after all. Even when it seemed like there was no way it would all work out in time!

I know this ended up being a very long entry! But I hope everyone realizes how monumental this is for us! I just can't even find enough words to describe how important it all is. Praise God!!

Many apologies for the delay

Where to begin?! Well, just in time for our 6 month raw anniversary, our internet connection was down for 2 days! That figures!!

Then, I got very sick and the next morning my youngest daughter got sick as well. We're still ridiculously ill. Fevers, chills, body aches, head aches, nausea, dizziness, extreme exhaustion, coughs, sore throat, and terrible congestion. My youngest hasn't been awake more than 2 hours in 3 days. Today my older daughter has finally come down with it. We caught it from my sister & her kids. The pediatrician told her it sounds like the flu. I don't think I've ever really had the flu before. I'm praying Greg doesn't get it. I don't think anyone could work with this illness, it's completely knocked us out of commission. I'm still in shock at how terrible we feel. My poor sister & her little ones are still feeling bad, so this doesn't go away quickly either, they had it 2 days before I got it.

So, bottom line, I haven't been able to sit here at the computer to update! I get dizzy, weak & nauseas every time I get up, or, well... do anything at all. I forced myself to send 3 emails, do this quick post, and wash a few dishes. That's the most activity I've been able to endure since Sat night!

Anyway, we did weigh in & we did take photos on the 13th. I just need to feel better so I can do the cropping type photo stuff and get it all online. That takes a little while. And to top it all off, I had some wonderful news on the 14th that totally relates to God's power, miracles, the raw lifestyle, improved health, and my very first post on this blog. I wanted so badly to post it right away with the 6 month stats, I mean it was just perfect timing! And then all this! But I'm telling you, it's amazing, truly praiseworthy news, folks! No...I'm not pregnant! ;o)

I figure if I could make myself spend a little time at the computer today, tomorrow should be even better, right?! So, I'll update as soon as possible, and I apologize for the delay!!

Oh, and I don't know how to do the photos from here on out! There's so many now. Any thoughts? Should I keep all the months together at each month's update, or just do a before shot and current shot from here on out? Ideas?

End of the fast!

So last night was the breaking of our fast! I had only fresh raw juices and water for 22 days, and Greg had days of the same mixed with days of only fruits & veggies. It was interesting to eat last night! After 3 weeks of nothing solid, it was odd! I has soaked prunes, so nothing too delicious! LOL! But I wanted to make sure my digestive system didn't revolt! I also had a bit of warmed miso broth, my first try at that. Today I haven't eaten yet, but I don't usually eat until early afternoon anyway. I plan to take it easy though, I don't want to send my body into shock! I have some more soaked prunes, so I'll start with that & then a simple green smoothie with a smidge of coconut oil. :o) Greg's transition isn't as slow, but he ate during the 22 days! Now he can add in olives & nuts again, as well as raw recipes! :o)

I released 10 pounds during the fast, and I'm cautious too eat many nuts and oils since I don't want to put much of it back on! I just need to take it slowly is all. I'll be back to eating any yummy raw creation I can think of in no time!! So, I did make it below 200 pounds!! WooHoo!! This morning I weighed in at 191! Greg released 5 pounds during the fast, and a bit more at the beginning of the month.

So, the fast itself was amazing! We had extra church services filled with a lot of prayer. It was great. When you sacrifice your flesh (not eating, or giving up something you enjoy) and let your spirit lead, it's really cool! It allows you to really get closer to God and for Him to draw closer to you. It doesn't get any better than that!!

5 months raw!!!!

Has it really been 5 months already? My goodness. Time flies when you're having fun!! We're feeling great! It's day 6 of our fast. I'm doing a 22 day juice & water fast, Greg is doing 22 days of fasting but he's alternating days of only juices & water with days of only fruits & veggies. So far we've really been enjoying it. Especially on a spiritual level. It's a bonus to know it's great for our health as well!

So, the 5 month stats! Yay!!

Greg now weighs 165 pounds! Woah!! He released 13 pounds this past month. His grand total is 75 pounds released so far in the last 5 months!! :o) He's gone from a size 40 pants to a 34 (which are now getting baggy).

I now weigh 201 pounds - I released 14 pounds this month. My grand total is 68 pounds released in the last 5 months!! :o) I've gone from a size 24 to a size 16! I fit in size XL shirts! I'll never need to shop in the plus size section again!!! I've lost 8 inches this past month for a total of 59 inches total.

Maybe someday soon some of those inches will come from my upper arms! I keep hoping those will change, perhaps that's one of the last things to lose? When I see before and after photos I always check double chins and upper arms. ;o) My neck is looking better than I had thought it would, and I'm thrilled to have a neck now! But the upper arms are a concern!

And I have to mention my weight being 201 pounds! I can't wait to get below 200! I was SO hoping I would do it by 5 months. But I know it's coming soon! In January of 2006 I weighed 296 pounds, so I'm very close to 100 pounds released from my highest weight 2 years ago. WooHoo!

To everyone who's been keeping up with our progress, and sending messages & leaving comments- We both want to say, thank you so much for your encouragement! The support we've received from all of you is incredible & we truly appreciate it!

Here are the photos. I didn't have any shirts that weren't baggy, but it was the best I could do!

2008!

Wow, where has the time gone? I know I should pop in here more often to update! I apologize to anyone who might be disappointed when they don't see a recent post. I know I feel that way when I peruse the blogs I like! I'm a busy mama though, doing my best!! :o)

So, we made it through the holidays! Or first season of holidays 100% raw. Yay! I t feels like this big accomplishment! LOL! I loved it, but Greg felt sentimental about missing the traditional foods part of celebrations.

I know some members of my family also felt a bit "robbed", like they couldn't fully enjoy times with us because we weren't sharing the same foods. I'm not saying that's right, or wrong. Just being honest. On that same wavelength, Greg said he sometimes feels isolated, like he can't participate in stuff with buddies because so much is centered around food.

For instance, if your a vegetarian, chances are if you go out with your friends, there's an option at the restaurant for you. If your an alcoholic and all your friends want to hang out in a bar, you can order club soda. Not the easiest thing, I'm sure, but the option is there. That's probably a poor example. For us, we can order a salad at a restaurant, but only if we bring our own dressing or just squeeze lemon on it. And we're not at the point of enjoying greens and lemon juice yet. :op So it's not anything spontaneous. Like hanging out after work one night. And it doesn't make anyone feel comfortable when we sit there with an empty place setting. No matter how positive our attitudes are, it makes others feel uncomfortable. Anyway, I just thought Id' throw that out there in the spirit of full disclosure since I haven't put a lot out there about the struggles associated with this lifestyle. Honestly, we haven't had too many struggles, but these issues do come up.

Here's my take. If the people that love us truly love us, and they do- then they enjoy our company, not just the fact that we would all eat the same food. But this year, for the holidays, Greg felt like he would spend way too much time feeling sad about the foods he loved in the past but is choosing not to eat now. So instead of enjoying the festivities, he would be having an inner struggle of why he wants those foods versus why he's chosen not to eat them. Basically, just being a downer and not having much fun himself. Thankfully, I haven't had this struggle. It's like God just took all of that from me, and I thank Him for that. I'm not sure how strong I could be in the face of the temptations if they were still tempting to me. I could have smelled the ham and sweet potatoes and apple pie and not be phased by it. I still can' believe that's true, but it has been so far, praise God! I mean I was addicted folks, really addicted to junk, and just SAD foods in general. I guess the good Lord knew I needed those chains broken so I could succeed at this. I admire Greg so much, because he still wants those foods, even though he was never addicted to them. He's confronted with temptation more than I am on a daily basis, and he's still 100% successful at this! That's amazing! And he'll tell you, it's God that gets the glory for that as well. When Greg is weak, God is stronger! We're doing this in obedience to Him and He has blessed the journey!

Now, don't misunderstand- we had a wonderful holiday season, really. But with it being our first one raw, it was an adjustment. That's all. Still joyful & we really focused on the true reason for the season. It wasn't awful, there were no tears, or hurt feelings. I don't mean to make it sound like that at all. It 's just that the holidays are such a ingrained thing in most of us, since childhood, and this was very different than the past 30 something years!

So next year, I really hope Greg has come to point where he won't feel sad about what he won't be eating. That way we can be with family while they're eating & really enjoy our own food, and enjoy the fellowship!! I'm praying that this happens! And that my girls won't sit there asking for every bit of "junk food" available in front of others who have that look on their face like we're depriving our children of so much just by telling them no, that's not very healthy. Like giving them nasty junk foods is a great thing!? Ugh! But that's a whole 'nuther post! :o) LOL!

Anyway- tomorrow begins our 21 day fast! We attend 2 churches, and one of them does this each year in January! We're so excited to join in!! Amazing things can happen when you're fasting and praying like that! I'm buying an inexpensive juicer tonight in order to make it a true juice fast the raw way!! Our first ever. Lots of church members are fasting on fruits and veggies, but- that's our daily diet! LOL! So smoothie fasting was an idea, but I'd much rather juice fast. I've heard excellent things about it . I kept hoping I could afford the juicer I really want and spent so much time researching. However, I have a $50 budget if I want to actually afford all the produce that would go into the juicer over 21 days!!! Wish us luck! We're expecting miracles!!

So I'll close with the family Christmas pic of this year! Happy New Year everyone!!!! Peace & love to all!
And I'll add a family picture from May 7 2005 for comparison. 2 1/2 years ago, what a difference! I was even larger than when I started the raw food lifestyle 5 months ago. I believe I was around 290 pounds or so. UGH!